cannot stand IT!
wa lao..
am super duper pissed..
with myself..
with everyone la..
y like that one.. so no more meeting..??
im like putting in more effort to getting things done the right way.. but i can't seem to get it right la.. i cannot seem to link it all.. HOW HOW HOW?? ai yo.. then dun wan meet le.. fine la.. so u all think that it is all done le?no comments.. no nothing.. u all got read anot? then?? i have been sitting in front of the com for hours.. but i can't seem to get anywhere.. how? some one.. HELP ME!! ARGH!!
F*C* la.. can just hand in like that anot?
see la..
just as expected.. no one came with their script..
n then what? we didn really get anything done today.. so if i didn volunteer to do the drawing.. then no one will do huh? hump!!
haiz... y like tt de.. n the written rpt.. how? never even read.. no comments.. like that can pass up r? hello.. mind u all its like what.. 20%... kaoz... la..
still haven gotten over..
had a drink just now.. wee.. muahahha..... down one bottle of breezer.. see la.. so sad right.. ha.. no one to pei me drink.. never.. i ownself entertain myself.. how sad can this be la.. haiz..
no one in sight..
no one to listen..
no one to speak..
no one to be there..
there is just NO ONE.. so well done.. i shall entertain myself.. with my bears.. so is this a self fulfilling prophecy?
feel so lonely.. baby im so lonely.. wo zhi dao.. lalalla...
who is going to bring me there? quick.. someone...!!
broken.. shattered..
my heart is not only brokeN!.. ITS SHATTERED.. wahha.. somemone.. quick save me..
haiz.. im so so sad.. depressed.. going insane..
im so so 'blind'
im so careless.. im so..
dumb..
so stupid..
just name it.. oh wad ever.. y is this so? haiz...
im really really sad r.. i did not pass.. so i have to wait yet another two months again.. what is all this mann.. then still have to pay another 500 bucks.. haiz.. so sad la.. when i mount curb.. then i was like.. oh shit.. then i ask him.. so immediate failure r.. he say ya.. then i say.. still drive r? then he say.. ya..
in the end.. all the other courses were fine.. n i had a short drive out.. didn even went onto the test route lar.. haiz.. then i sian diao already..
mount curb.. immediate failure.. i was thinking to myself.. then still want to continue r.. but he say.. ya continue.. so continue le la.. in just 2 mins.. i knew my fate already.. hai... y like that de?
then when doing debriefing.. he asked.. u angry with me r?
i was like.. huh? angry with u for what? haha..
then he say.. i see ur face.. just now when i say immediate failure then u like not happy already?
im like.. oh wad ever.. oh... so im supposed to laugh or smile? coz i have immediate failure? wa lao.. of course not.. knowing my fate.. continued driving.. but not in the mood already lar.. so SIAN!!
i dunnoe what is worng la.. haiz.. then in skl now.. waiting for lesson.. n then later have to meet up with those people who are most likely going to be late.. so sian la.. do prj.. also dunnoe if we r getting anywhere.. ask them to see the report also never see.. even when i have done like three quaters of it? no comments? then how to continue.. so im supposed to do the whole report? i dunnoe la.. then the presentation how? i'll see later if u all have come up with ur script anot.. if not it is so meaningless to meet up today la.. sian..
yan li.. ok.. so i book u the coming jan r.. haha.. meantime.. have fun studying.. n ahve fun teaching.. haha..
lol.. haiz.. my eyes very pain now r.. no mood to do anything le la.. haiz.. haiz haiz.. !! argh.. angry with myself.. not with u la..
i just love this song mannz.. KeKz... ")
Rick Astley- Together Forever
If there's anything you need
All you have to do is say
You knew you satisfy everything in me
We shouldn't waste a single day
So don't stop me falling
It's destiny calling
A power I just can't deny
It's never changing
Can't you hear me, I'm sayingI want you for the rest of my life
* Together forever and never to part
Together forever we two
And don't you knowI would move heaven and earth
To be together forever with you
If they ever get you down
There's always something I can do
Because I wouldn't ever wanna see you frownI'll always do what's best for you
There ain't no mistaking
It's true love we're making
Something to last for all time
It's never changing
Can't you hear me, I'm sayingI want you for the rest of my life(* repeat)
So don't stop me falling
It's destiny calling
A power I just can't deny
It's never changing
Can't you hear me, I'm sayingI want you for the rest of my life(* repeat)
hohoho..
ok.. so today's driving was fine.. hmm.. close to perfect..
i really pray that u would be there to guide me n see me through tml.. *wink wink* n that tml would be the best shot! kekz..
magde.. dun scared.. relax.. dun stress.. n u will be fine ok? jia you jia you jia you..
n today was sylvester again.. so he said.. so good luck for tml r.. will be waiting for ur coffee tml.. ") kekz... ok.. i hope so! **)
right? wrong?
ai yo.. today.. i started the day wrongly! not that i got up from the wrong side of the bed.. but i got up late. thought that the clock was spoilt or smth? alamak.. so i called my father see if he was near.. then can come fetch me.. wee.. so i was one wholee hr late for lect. what is this mann! somemore apparently the lecturer wanted to say smth abt the exam.. but heard from my frewn that he didn la.. lol.. wa lao.. make me so stress..
then was soci tutorial.. oh mann.. we presented.. n mr gui kept on saying good good... n then he nod his head.. n the smiled.. see how cheerful he is.. he is always having the smile on la.. n then he say that he is going to give us an A+ wee.. that made my day le la.. oh my.. so cool.. kekz.. way to go mann..
then was soci lecture.. n guess what! the guest lecturer is my tutor.. mr gui.. he is really one farnie guy la.. n can see that his is very loving to his wife de la.. keep on talking about her.. even in the lecture.. wow.. heard that he is going to get his PHD in like one to two months time.. so smart mann! so cool.. so sian mu his wife right.. haha.. lol.. think he has a very happy family.. plus he love his wife so very much.. plus plus.. u can always see him smile la.. he is like never sad.. looking at him will make u smile le lar.. remembering what he said on the first lesson.. he said that in singapore it is not so a norm to smile.. haha.. but when he was young.. he was being socialised to smile.. n to greet elders.. n till today.. he still has the wide smile on la.. n that his adult hood cannot socialise him enough to make him not smile.. muahhaa.. so farnie.. lol..
then it rained.. n then.. home i went.. with mummy.. alamal.. JAM.. bad bad.. JAM..
home.. bathe.. n then was on my way to driving le.. alamak.. guess what.. is that r handsome again.. this time.. gosh.. i did not bring my book.. how can? it was in my bag a while ago.. i was stunned.. it actually came off when i unpacked my bag.. argh.. then i told him that i didn have my book.. no PDL.. means cannot drive on the road.. so he say he go n check if there is any alt.. in the end.. no choice.. he drive me home to take.. wahaha.. mr francis. alamak.. ahha.. lol.. then it was like so waste time la.. but today's driving was fine.. was like.. hmm.. ok la.. just for a minor hit on the curb. coz he make me fen xin la.. keep on talking to me.. he also in the end let me end late la.. so not so bad.. haha.. in the car he really ask me alot of things la.. n this drive was like so qing song.. wahaha.. n guess what! he is not married yet.. but he is 28 le la.. haha.. n have gf le.. he ask me if i have bf.. go clubbing.. put make up when i go out not.. then im like no no no.. then he was like huh? u sure not.. like he never hear of such thing before la.. coz he say that at this age sld be the havoc stage la.. then he ask me what i normally do la.. lol.. so wad sia.. n then he also say what when ren lao.. things n mindsets change.. like last time he won go exercise.. but coming month or smth he will be goin for the marathon run or smth.. lol.. n last time.. dun play golf de.. now r.. ai yo.. ppl ask then will feng pei la.. n then.. when ppl age.. will plan for future de.. like if u lose job or what.. at least he has the part time thingy to fall back on.. wahahha.. so sophicated.. lol.. ai yo.. zhong zhi.. alamak.. y am i talking about him..!! argh.. ok so recaping.. do all the courses in gear one..i will be fine.. n then dun go too near curb.. always go slow.. n then.. count one two.. before i turn.. so that i won strike curb.. so that i won turn too early.. other than that.. i will be FINE.. ok?
so tml i will have any shot at it.. before fri.. looking forward.. sleepy.. must go n sleep le. so tml will be cool n good.. n fri.. the best mann..? right. jia you jia you jia you.. magde! u can do it..
oh yay.. heard from an that he going to have his chem pract tml? yea? jia you too worz.. kekz..")
stress..
oh no....!!! think im feeling STRESS!! how HOW how?
SOB sob SOb..
test on fri.. i really hope to make it.. im stressing over it.. coz.. i mount curb again today.. how?
i must drive slower.. n dun turn too fast.. that was his advice.. and and and.. keep a look out of cyclist.. n people on the road.. gosh!
i must i must i must... stay calm.. stay cool.. dun fret...
i must get IT!!
wa lao..
kaoz..
lol.. when u point ur finger and accuse someone if something.. guess what? u r pointing the other four at urself! do some self reflection! what kind of attitude.. u think what.. ya.. im bigger.. im bigger in everyway.. so u wanna fight? u wanna see who win? u try? dun push too far!! then i almost overturn the table.. n the soup poured.. then complaint complaint complaint.. u think u not in the wrong.. some kind of aspire to be lawyer.. my foot! u just talk nonsense.. dun even noe where u learn all this from.. u dun think r???
HURT.. oh.. who cares.. maybe i sld not exist.. then i won have to endure all this stupid thing.. u think im made of what? siao! dun even acknowledge my contribution.. instead blame me n everyone else for the 'bad' results.. SOMETHING WRONG!! what is wrong with U???!!! no improvement? got B4? who is to blame? what is ur attitude in class.. what is ur stupid attitude?!!!
on the bright side..
congrats.. gal.. from B4 to A1.. well done..
congrats gal... from fail to C5.. well done..
ok.. so what does this show? anyway.. all of u continue to work hard.. n get ur As...!! ") cheers!!
CoMplicaTED!!
what exactly do i want??
im sad..
im lonely..
im scared..
i cannot go to sleep!!!
i want sleeping pills.. so that i can go to sleep..
i want stabilising pills.. so that i will not get so emotional..
i want pills.. so that i can concentrate when im doing work..
im always wondering.. where to???
things isint really going right? the biz prj.. no one wanna put in effort r? im trying to get as much done.. coz? it constitutes like half of the grade.. can u all like cooperate???!!
went driving today. then keep on hit curb two times like tt? then brush curb once? wide turning? i can't seem to be concentrating? i hope that the next few lessons will be fine.. before my final.. n that if i want to make mistakes.. make them all now.. so that on the actual i will not falter? will that do? i really wanna pass this time!!
then went home to sleep for the next three hrs? wa lao.. isint this like a waste of time? i dunnoe la.. wanted to study.. but seemed to be wondering else where.. y Y y Y?? can somemone bring me back? im like in lala land! wake UP!!
super sad about my driving today.. probably its one of the 'BAD'days.. as the instructor would say.. so the other days must be good r.. coz its nearing.. i cannot afford to be afraid.. to conqure.. to conquest.. coz the first lesson was counted good wad? what happened today.. then kept on pondering where i had gone wrong.. :(
i hope that tml will be a better day.. my mood would be better.. that i will not think too much.. too much time on my hands that i waste them thinking of the unnecessary.. WHAT SLD I DO?? can someone come to my rescue? exams also going to come le.. so i must concentrate on studying.. to do the best of my ability.. so.. tml tml tml.. i will chiong chiong chiong.. tired mannz.. n all day.. i have me myself n i to talk to.. whats all this mann.. uni life.. is not fun!
The feElinG of...
im sad.. im lonely.. im scared..
i don't know y.. i just feel lost..
its very horrible..
what should i do??
this is so STUPID!!
the stupidest thing that can happen mann.. wahaha.. im so PIssED..
then again.. its my fault.. oh.. wad ever.. it says this...
Do not assume that you can submit drafts to Turnitin because you can do so in other courses. In the instructions on the exam, you are told to submit your examination answer (not drafts)
but but but.. that dosen't make sense does it? coz in an exam, one is allowed to make changes to the paper even if it is at the last min.. isit it?? wahaha.. then i wanted to change some stuffs.. unfortunately.. i cannot re upload le.. sob sob.. what is this mann.. they sld have specified that no resubmissions are allowed!!
then i went to find him.. he said that he could not do anything.. coz he is not the head! well done mann.. so how? then he say.. that it dosen't really make any diff does it? the draft n the actual.. but thing is that some of the sentance that i had put in made no sense at all.. hai yoz.. but what can i do.. he also said.. anyway it constitutes only a small part of the whole weightage.. well done mann.. lol. ok lol.. what ever.. hope that that will do la.. what to do.. i cannot do anything wad.. unlike the other mod.. where if ya not happy can just delete the file n resubmit lol.. so long as it is before the deadline.. ARGH!!~~!!
ThinKing about what SHE said...
she asked me what skl am i in..
she asked me what fac am i in..
she asked me if i did joined any camps..
she asked me if life there is fun..
what do i actually want??
pondering upon them,... what do i want.. a vibrant varsity life? or something that is lonely.. lonely.. lonely.. YES!! there arn't many friends to make there.. i am into the erm.. six week or so of studies le.. who are my real friends.. there are none that i have made there.. seriously.. they are maybe some hi-bye friends? acquantince u may call em? or they are mearly just people that u meet.. dun talk n just walk away.. life in uni is BORING!! u have to make it interesting.. unlike some other uni.. where i hear my cuz having so much there??.. hmmm... so so diff.. she says that she can empathize with me la.. sobsob.. lol.. so ke lian.. :( unless u had joined the camps in the hols.. many many of em.. otherwise.. life there will really.. be LONELY!! im not kidding! so to all incoming freshmens.. pls take note.. if u want it to be interesting.. u've gotta join many of the hols camp.. hai.. anyway.. see how next year la.. if im into the organising of camps.. maybe... things may just change.. n ill have more fun there.. haha..
yappie.. so fun so fun.. i finish my soci midterm exam le.. FINALLY!! its done.. relieved.. kekz.. if not r.. wahaha.. i spent loads of time on it lei.. ai yo.. think like got ten hrs la.. last night.. four hrs.. then this afternoon.. another dunnoe how many hrs.. once again.. i wanna declare.. dunnoe if my essay make sense not.. hai yo.. hope so la..kekz.. i wanna get the A band!! ") hope i can get it.. improving improving improving.. in the process of improving.. kekz.. YAPPIE!! alamak.. then again r.. next time must do faster.. coz final exam dun have ten hrs for me to spare r..!! magde.. take note of the time.. WEI!! time is running.. haha..
mon have econs tut.. haha.. so have to so read up on the econs notes n do the tutorial le.. weeee..
haha.. so happy.. just now did the mock test on evolution.. for the BIO de.. haha.. i got all correct.. kekz.. lalalala.. happy happy happy...
tml is yet another day.. another day to make history.. another day to discover... to make do with.. n to make full use of!! so that when it comes to exam it will be easier.. kekz..
~magdeMoN~
heh.. had my first test in NUS today.. wahaha.. so cool.. so cold.. burrr.. it was kinda cold in there.. alamak.. y they turn the aircon so low.. then again.. who cares mann.. just goin in there to do my best.. to give my best.. i've studies.. so sld be fine lol.. like what tt ah ger say.. dun bother to compare ans.. if u think is right than is right lol.. whats done is done.. but then.. i went home to check..n i found one mistake le.. a grave one.. coz its abt the concepts.. alamak.. how can i not noe.. its the basics! naughty GIRL!!.. blehz.. hope that the rest of the paper is fine lol.. haha.. so fun so fun.. kekz..
my first test.. IT WILL BE A GOOD ONE.. since i presume that most r correct la.. ")
after test went to maxi house.. coz her b dae tml ma.. so in advance.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL.. haha.. was not there for long.. sorry eh.. go all the way to attain ur superstar dreams.. of course.. there will be many expectations, many things that must be given up along the way.. heard from her that there r many rehersals to follow.. must go pick clothes.. n do recording.. really da mang ren sia.. lol.. then also lesser freedom le.. so see.. there is an OPPORTUNITY COST to everything.. hai.. all i have to say is all the best lol...
going to have my driving test soon.. gonna resume driving next week.. n this time i MUST PASS.. ok..!! so ex.. so must pass.. n then can have freedom on the road le.. of course.. also must take into account safety la.. if not wait ppl get worried.. of the car.. wahahha.. kekz.. so looking forward.. gonna give it my very best.. i pray that all will do well on that day lol.. heh... n that there r no reckless drivers around!! ")
just a few days ago.. i saw the union of two special individulas... so sian mu.. haha. coz they had been together for like ten years?? hmm.. around there le.. n then decided to get married..!! wee.. congrats mann.. kekz.. so pretty pretty.. go enjoy ur honeymoon.. sweet sweet.. kekz.. then after come back born baby.. so that ma ma can have great grand childern.. won't that be super cool.. haha. i think that is!! hehz.. CONGRATS!~!
lalalal.. tml no skl.. but have loads of readings to do.. so i shall be guai.. n go read up.. n then that project r.. so stupid la.. she wans me to dunnoe put what frequent misconceptions.. alamak.. how am i goin to find prove.. n all the info.. sob sob.. somemore.. its like i have reach the world limit le.. STRESS!! sobsob.. then the BIZ prj lei.. MUST GET TO WORK LE.. we r gonna present soon.. hai.. where is everyone..?? this weekend got term paper to do for soci.. so must be guai.. stay at home n do.. so no going to help my uncle.. haha.. n then n then.. so happy.. lallala.. got back my second tutorial today.. for soci..n im getting a B.. kekz.. last time was B-.. weeee.. improving so HAPPY!! kek... all the way..!! u CAN dO IT maGDe!! jiA YoU!! weeeeeeeeeeeee...
