LuV MakEs ThE WorlD Go RoUnD

what Do I REALLY wAnt???

WhAt do i Really wAnt??
WhaT's mY purpose Of bEing TherE?
WhaT waS mY MotiVation of a Sudden ChangE?
WhO aM I??

So many answers that im looking for.. n once again.. i ask myself WHO AM I?? i don't knoe what im really doin larx.. but finally everything is sort of settled le..

I HAVE ONLY ONE CONCLUSION... THE PAST MATTERS..
where u came from, what u did, who u mingled with n the people u meet along the way.. everything matters.. one wrong step or move may render difficulties in further endevours..

haiz.. what really struck me was when u asked what was ur aim or main motivation for wanting to run for this post? why is there like a sudden change? from a not so active sport to one that is kinda physically demanding.. moreover, what qualities do u render that will make good the post that u r running for.. stunned.. pondered.. it seemed like im not prepared for like everything.. then she asked.. u sure that u can do it? r u prepared to make that kinda sacrifices? do u mind getting all dirty n stuff like that.. it just seemed so so wrong.. so i decided to back out..
call me a coward.. i think im not really ready..
when i msged her that i wanted to back out.. what she said was.. its ok.. so long as u dun regret ur decision..

many atimes, we have to make decisions.. for the better or for the worst.. that i don't know.. im probably not ready.. then again.. there is a baby step to everything.. if u dun try how would u noe? i really thought about it then i sent her that msg.. then i felt kinda relieved.. so i think i have made the right choice?? if not its like something lingering around in my mind n i can't be at peace! gosh.. okok.. think i will just concentrate on my studies n tution.. n not anything else?? will that be good?? then if there is time ill join them in the holidaes to some where lo?? cyclohunt?hmm.. that sounds good?? not yet the start so im not sure if im really that busy.. but i noe that there r gonna be quite a few assignments comin up..
biz project, sea fieldtrip, bio fieldtrip, n probably more to come..
probably i'll just tie myself round here n there when the time comes lo?? like next year's arts camp? i dunnoe..

u hope that u will be there to guide me n show me the way.. to be there to support me.. i just wanna be happy.. get to knoe more ppl.. broaden my social circle.. but there r just so many 'hi-bye' friends.. which of them r real? which of them r true? is it that hard to find any as u grow older? ive yet to know of any as of now..

posted by MaGdE @ 12:03 AM